How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #3) - DeYtH Banger (bts book recommendations TXT) 📗

in relationships with partners whose attractiveness is about equal to their own. This does not mean that Cinderella's good fortune is not possible, but the likelihood of its happening is not high.

Similarity, however, is a somewhat vague property. Thus, one can find similarities and dissimilarities between any two human beings. Love depends upon many different factors, and it would undoubtedly be oversimplification to explain it by referring merely to similarity. Nevertheless, some measure of similarity is usually helpful in maintaining love relations.

 

Referring to the notion of a comfort zone, we may say that our partner should be within the core of our comfort zone; this requirement, which is fulfilled by the similarity factor, ensures that we will feel comfortable with the partner. However, in order to ensure excitement in the relationship, the partner should be able to expand our comfort zone; this may be fulfilled if the partner is somewhat different from us. Opposites do attract, since they may enlarge our comfort zone, but significant differences can throw us out of our emotional equilibrium into discomfort.

In the case of sexual desire, the relationship is more limited in nature, and the issue of background similarity is of less importance; differences and changes are more significant. The longer the sexual relationship endures, the more important the issue of similarity becomes, as these indicate the couple's compatibility.

 

Romantic partners show strong similarity in age, political, and religious attitudes; moderate similarity in education, general intelligence, and values; and little or no similarity in personalitycharacteristics. For instance, Ryan, a divorcee in her late forties who holds conservative views, said: "I would not be able to marry a man who was a leftist, even if I found him very attractive-although most of the men I have slept with are leftists."

 

While strong attitudinal similarity clearly plays a part in mate selection, it is the similarity of personality related domains that ought to be considered when selecting a mate. Findings provided by Lou and Klohnen suggest a positive correlation between similarity and marital quality via personality-related domains but not via attitude related domains. It seems that, in fact, people are attracted to-and end up marrying partners with-similar attitudes and values, but the partners often differ in personality traits. However, once in a committed relationship, it is primarily the similarity in personality that influences marital happiness. The attitudinal similarity, which is easier to detect, seems to be more important for the initial stages of the relationship, but personality similarity becomes more important as the relationship increases in commitment.

 

We tend to fall in love and stay with people who share with us profound similarities, which can be expressed differently in various stages of the relationship; the presence of such essential similarities need not preclude-and may even encourage-differences related to surface manifestations within the basic similarity. Following Chomsky's distinction between deep structures underlying a linguistic expression and its surface forms, which manifest the same meaning in a different manner. Profound love involves deep common structures and different surface manifestations. Differences attract, but only within a shared general framework which leaves ample space for complementary differences. Nina, a married woman, compares herself to her lover thus: "There are so many deep things I find in him that are like me, and this attracts me so much. And on the surface I find so many exciting things that are new to me, and this attracts me to him so much, too."

 

We may say, then, that people with whom we share a similar background or social framework are those with whom we are most likely not merely to fall in love, but to maintain this love for a longer period of time.

 

 

 

 

Female Turn-Ons

 

 

 

 

Most guys will classify themselves as either a 'boob man' or an 'ass man' (or sometimes both), but what about the ladies? Into what categories do they fall and what are their eyes drawn to first when they meet an attractive guy a.ka. you?

 

Like with most things in life, rather than sticking to two simple body parts, women are a bit more complicated and all over the map when it comes to which male assets they find to be the sexiest.

Yeah, we realize that's not ultra helpful, but here's a pretty good summary of what turns her on the most when she sees you, courtesy of a very informative thread titled 'Women of Reddit, what is the female equivalent of being a "Tit man" or an "Ass man?"'

'Pick Her Up' Arms

Arms. When he looks like he can pick you up at will, and carry you around, or hold you up while he's... nvm. - bombacl0t

Strong Back

I know a lot of "Strong Back" women. - VerliMintzi

I was just scrolling through looking for this. This is my absolute favorite part of a guy...I would hang a mirror above my bed just to watch those back muscles flex while having some sexy backed fella on top of me. - qaboutp

Shoulders & Lines

 

Shoulders. I love broad, muscular shoulders. 

Oooh and the lines from the shoulders to the hips. 'Lawd, I'm at work and I need to stop. - Furry_Bananas

McConaughey Hands

I like hands quite a lot but I doubt that's a universal thing. - onion-guy

All the ladies at work sitting around me are going to see Interstellar because they hope to catch a glimpse of Mathew McConaugheys hands. No joke. - chrono14

 

Happy Trail Peek

For me sneaking a peek at that lil bit of happy trail when their shirt lifts up a little, is like sneaking a peek of girls boobs. Both exhilarating and totally flustering. uuuuffffff - vikavikavika

 

Underrated Badonkadonk

I don't understand why mens asses are so underrated. I could stare at those things all day. -qaboutp

 

The V

Not a girl, but I frequently hear talk of the magical man "V". - Cleverpenguins

 

Rugby Thighs

Thighs or biceps. Rugby is my porn. - mystery_boxx

 

 

 

 

Effective Pickup Lines

 

 

 

Type “pick-up lines for women” into Google and you’ll get a slew of cheesy results. Pick-up lines call to mind a sunglasses-wearing douche saying with a grin: “Hey, sweetheart, did you just fall out of heaven?” (It’s hard to take that guy seriously.) But the truth about pickup lines is this: they are extremely powerful when used effectively. If you can come up with something punchier and more creative than the lazy “Hey, can I buy you a drink?” you’re certain to leave a good impression. (Also, you’ll have a great story to tell your grandkids some day.)

 

At the same time, you shouldn’t be overthinking it! At its heart, a pickup line is just a way to spark an interesting conversation with a woman you’re attracted to! Here, we lay out some tips and pickup lines you can use in different situations when you want to make that cute stranger notice you. Remember, these are dependent on whatever context you might be in.

 

Use Your Environment

 

Ok, so you have zero knowledge of what the redhead in your gourmet cooking class likes. EXCEPT that she…clearly likes to cook! That’s a great place to start from. Make your way over to her station and ask her if she has an extra spatula. Compliment her on how great her chocolate tart turned out. Start a little flirtation over the soup of the day. Whatever you’re feeling, this is a fantastic route to find out if she’s single and (hopefully) get her number eventually.

 

Maybe you’re not at a cooking class. Maybe she’s standing awkwardly in the corner at your best friend’s housewarming party, or waiting in a long line at the DMV with you. Wherever you are, this is an opportunity for you to strike up a conversation about your surroundings.

 

Make an observation about how the man bun seems to be coming back, judging by all the man buns you see at the party. Comment on how badly your team is losing at sports league -- anything about what’s going on around you.

Hey, so I’m looking for the dip for these nachos -- seen a bowl of dip anywhere? John ALWAYS forgets to make enough dip for his parties.

 

That creates an instant camaraderie between the two of you, and before you know it, you’ll be hunting for dip together.

 

Ask a Question

 

Compliments are great. Compliments (of the non-creepy variety) are generally highly appreciated, but as far as pick-up lines go? Compliments aren’t the best pick-up lines, because they aren’t designed to get the other person talking.

Say she’s wearing a great dress. You could go over and compliment her on her great dress, and then she says “Thank you”. Now what? Now you’re both standing there awkwardly, because you’ve run into a conversational dead end. That’s not ideal, and she’s probably wondering when you’re going to walk away. Instead of delivering a forced compliment, consider opening with a friendly question.

Hey, it’s my first time at this trivia night, do you know what time the game starts? Do I have enough time to duck out and grab a beer?’ Keep the question simple. “So, how do you know John? I’m kind of mad he never introduced us.

That is a perfect way to get her talking. “Well, I met John at summer camp way back when...“ and now it’s a real, proper conversation between the two of you, versus a two-second interaction.

 

Don’t Try to Hide What You’re Doing. Own It

 

She knows exactly why you’re approaching her out of everybody in the room. You’re attracted to her! That’s okay. Don’t act as if you’re looking to just make friends with her, or get huffy when she says “I’m not interested.” (“Well, I wasn’t asking you on a date, so…” is the absolute worst response you could give in this situation.)

 

Own what you’re doing, in a chill way. If you’re really confident, you can even make a joke out of it:

Hey, so I was wondering, do you have a couple minutes for me to hit on you? If not, just say the word.

That’s a nice way to break the ice. It also signals to her that you’re a relaxed, humorous guy who won’t be mad about getting rejected -- the Holy Grail, in other words. Even if she says No, you’re going to walk away with grace: a clear winner.

 

Don’t Do Too Much. Let Her Come to You

 

There’s one thing you may have noticed about the absolute best pickup lines: they’re the ones that are creative, that leave a woman intrigued, but that don’t also put too much pressure on her. After all, the goal of an opening line is a conversation, and women are much more likely to talk when they’re feeling relaxed! That means you shouldn’t be cornering her in the kitchen at the neighborhood BBQ and asking her with an intense gaze whether she’s single. That may play off sexy in romcoms, but it can be super creepy in real life.

 

Instead, try something like:

 

Hey, I just noticed two things about you. One, you’re beautiful. Two, you’re not holding a drink. I make a great spicy lemonade, and I’ll be over there by the grill checking my phone. Ya know, in case you get thirsty.

This type of pickup line is ideal because you’re not being pushy. It tells her you’re confident, and that you’re secure enough to leave her alone afterward. Now the ball’s in her court, and you’ve left her tantalized and ready to make the move. When it comes to sexy approaches, remember the golden rule: less is more. Give her space, and you’ll be surprised to find how quickly she comes to you.

Good luck!

 

 

 

 

Chapter 3 - FVG (Part 3)